Going in peace…

Some people say it’s morbid but I prefer to make plans for my family in case I have to leave this world before them. Over the past few months, I’ve summarised our household’s financial situation – mainly our assets and liabilities. During the exercise, we also reviewed our insurance needs with our financial consultant. The only thing left to do was writing a will so we can name our executors, beneficiaries and guardians for M, in case we have to go before she reaches adulthood.

The Intestate Succession Act applies in situations when a person dies without a will (intestate) or if the will left behind is incomplete. It governs who gets the deceased’s estate in what proportion and who can manage the estate. Personally, I think that if either me or Matt were to go first, it may not be a big issue dying intestate. However, it can get complicated if the worst scenario should happen, i.e. both of us dying together. *Touch wood*

In most cases, family members apply to be executors of the deceased’s estate as well as guardians of the deceased’s children. But we would rather save them the anguish of having to make those tough decisions on our behalf. Dying testate (with a will) also gives us peace of mind that M will be in good hands in the event that we can’t be there for her.

And the price of this peace of mind – $920 for the 2 of us!

SAHM to FTWM: a sea change!

Finally got time to pen some thoughts. It’s been a hectic month for our family, trying to adjust our daily routine to accommodate my move back to the workforce. Contrary to what many think, the move has impacted Matt most among the three of us.

M is pretty well settled in full-day care so she is in fact the least affected. Apart from being picked up later from school in the evenings, her daily routine hasn’t changed very much. Well, she cried a fair bit in the first week when she woke up in the mornings to find that mummy had already left for work but she got used to it fairly quickly.

As for me, it has been surprising easy except for trying to stay awake the whole day (no more afternoon naps!). LOL. Being in a new job in a new industry has definitely energised me in a some ways. Due my absence from home, Matt has had to step in to handle most of M’s daily routine and the household chores.

And hence he’s been complaining about the ‘hardship’ he’s going through. Well, I wish I could help out more but the hours I’m away really does not allow me to do so. We’re exploring options to lighten Matt’s responsibilities, including hiring a domestic helper.

So, people have been asking if I’ve been missing M now that I’m working full-time. The answer is ‘yes, but I miss my personal time even more!’ In my non-working hours, should I catch up on things I enjoy or should I spend the commonly termed ‘quality’ time with M? That must be the biggest dilemma for every FTWM!

Gotta go…

The real Africa…

As the recent World Cup showcased the best of South Africa, I can’t help being affected by the contrast presented in 2 articles in the June 14 and 28 issues of TIME magazine about the plight of women and children in other parts of impoverished Africa.

Authored by Alice Park, The Perils of Pregnancy: One Woman’s Tale of Dying to Give Birth tells of how a woman in Sierra Leone lost her life at age 18 after giving birth to a pair of twins due to the lack of medical services. According to the article, “… childbirth remain among the leading causes of death of woman worldwide; every day, one woman per minute dies while giving birth or soon after.” The pictures in the article were especially disturbing, including the 18 year-old’s final moments.

The next article, Battling A Scourge by Alex Perry, is about how the children of a small town in Uganda – Apac suffers from malaria, where “almost 90% of malaria victims are children under 5”. It’s hard to imagine raising kids in these extreme conditions, and reminds me again of how fortunate we are to live in Singapore.

So, there is always two sides to every story…

Arty Farty…

We brought M to the Singapore Arts Museum – Art Garden exhibition recently. It is housed in a new building a short distance from the main museum – SAM at 8 Queen Street. It was a rainy weekday afternoon and perfect for an indoor activity like this. Apart from a group of school children, there were not many visitors and so we enjoyed lotsa space.

As promised by their advertisement, the exhibits were designed to interest children. There were motion picture/ animation as well interactive exhibits. M especially enjoyed the Funky Forest,Daisies and Enchanted Forest exhibits where she could run around and were be engaged. She did not appreciate the motion picture/ animation as much, especially the Ringmaster, which had fighting scenes and monsters. Personally, I thought the Floribots exhibit was most intriguing.

We covered all the exhibits leisurely in about 2 hours. Definitely a fun activity for the family. Children under 6 enjoy free admission with every paying adult. It’s ending its run this week, so catch it before its too late!

Skin prick test….

M went for her skin prick test at KK Hospital last week and the results showed she has developed mild allergies towards some common foods and environment factors. She tested positive in varying small degrees to all 13 items – 4 environment and 9 food, including house and dust mite, cockroach, cat hair, cow’s milk, soy milk, egg (whole), egg (white), peanut, sesame seed, wheat, fish, shellfish.

Her allergic reactions are considered mild. The paediatrician said that there is no need to abstain from the food items because she needs a balanced diet but that we should give them less frequent and not in big amounts. We had been suspecting her allergy to cow’s milk and have switched her to goat’s milk for about three months now. But the other food items kinda surprised us. Both Matt and I are ok with them, except for shellfish, which occasionally causes some itch.

M was actually very afraid of the test. We had earlier bought her a book on asthma to help explain why she needs the inhaler to breathe in her medicine (Ventolin). In the book, allergies and the skin prick test were also mentioned. She even asked if the test was painful. So, when we told her we’re going to bring her for the test, she was resistant.

But the lab technicians at KK were very prepared – with DVD player, sweets and stickers. They also showed respect for the patient by always informing them what they were going to do beforehand. Although we still had to physically restrain M while the technician conduct the test, I think their approach helped minimise whatever anguish she felt. For example, when the technician had to draw some dots on M’s back with a pen in order to take measurements, she told M ‘see, I’m going to draw a smiley face only, it won’t be painful’. M wittily responded with ‘No, angry face, not smiley face’.

After the visit, we decided we must minimise her intake of processed foods, including sweets and biscuits, which we’re guilty of using as rewards often for being co-operative. These foods usually contain milk, egg, wheat flour. As for the environmental factors, we’ll keep her room and bedding items as clean as possible. But we have less control outside…

Still, M has to continue with another 3 more months of the anti-allergic medication – ketotifen before her next review!